The Blahs...

We all have a case of the blahs today. Yesterday seems to have wiped Katie out. She is tired. The little girl who never knew how to sit still doesn't like to leave the couch anymore. She cannot point to any one boo boo, so our best guess is that she just feels terrible period. She did have a bath today (it was time!), and Rick patiently combed all the dreads out of her beautiful hair. (She still sleeps on her back, and she is a restless sleeper, so if we don't comb it out often, it really gets ugly on the back of her head.) The bad news is that she is beginning to lose her hair. It is thinning at any rate. She now has a braid, however, and it is pretty. Her papa does such a good job. We did tell Katie that she will probably lose some of her hair, so she is prepared, and Rick has agreed to shave his head in solidarity, but Josh doesn't want anything to do with this plan!...

The good news is that Joshua continues to hold up remarkably well. He thoroughly enjoyed skiing on Friday. He required reminders that technique is more important than speed (:)), but he returned unscathed from this adventure. He had his first basketball clinic today, too, and he really enjoyed it. We have some skills to work on(!), but it was fun to see him playing and being a kid. He was partners with his best buddy Jack during some exercises, and I was really pleased with how focused they were. He is a surprisingly good kid. I saw one of his teachers today, and she told me that Joshua has been teaching the kids at school all about leukemia. He is growing up so fast. I worry that we won't be able to spend enough time with him or to give him enough attention. It is hard to be a normal family. We are trying, though. We ALL fell asleep in the same bed last night after reading a Magic Tree House story, and it was so satisfying to have had that time together. Joshua is playing with his cousin Kyler today, and I expect that he is perfectly happy. Special thanks to the community at St. Paul's School, where everyone is working hard to maintain his routine and to provide Joshua with some extra love and encouragement. It is a safe and happy place for him, and I would guess that it will make a big difference to him in the long months to come.

I think that may be why we have the blahs. We have all been running on adrenaline for days, and the extra energy is finally wearing off. We are beginning to realize just how little we can do to make Katie well and that we have to allow the medications the time they need to work magic in her little body. It is so unsettling to sit idly by, waiting and watching. We are ALWAYS positive when Katie is near. She doesn't need to worry about us worrying. She will not see me cry if I can help it. We will probably have our low moments in the months to come, though, so please bear with us. What we know with our brains--Katie will be just fine--is sometimes hard to remember in our hearts. So many joys await our little girl. It's just so hard to be patient.